starting over and over, getting better, looking forward

Life's frustrating. At least mine is.

Nothing's really linear, nothing really makes any sense. I don't know if this is a normal thing, if
this is a mid life crisis thing or what(crisis what crisis?..great supertramp album)?

Does everyone go through this? and how does 1 focus if 1 doesn't know what 2 focus on?

Anyway, this thing about working my way back 2 being fit this week has hit a huge road block. Spent most of the week at home with a sick kid, and during that time, well, i knew i was also kind of ill...and this morning, guess what? really sick.

A lot of us runners and such know, or at least think we know, is that, yep, when we're sick, it's time 2 be sick. Yet there's this thingie that if the sick is above the shoulders it's okay to train, if it's below the neck, nope, don't.

The 1 thing we never factor in though, is wondering if it's safe enuff train and not die?
Will running or swimming or working out make us worse or make us better? or is it just an innocuous type of thingie?

well, think about it? You're not resting, your heart rate is elevated, your lungs r working extra hard, you're tired to start with, so training, hmm, i'm guessing will just wear u out more, and prolong whatever u have, or it will forever keep coming back, whenever you start pushing again, and become 4-ever chronic.
It's sort of like treating an injury. do u wait for the broken ankle 2 heal, or do u start running as soon as the cast is off? i don't think it's an either or thing, i think u get better, u feel better, u wait a day, and then get out and test the waters. i know, i know, i've blown a whole week of training this week, but, i can't build that all back up in 1 work out, on day 1. I can, though, just start where i left off, and build up yet again from there.

I guess it also depends on the reasons, the goals.
My main goal for 2011 was and still is 2 get better, 2 get healthy, 2 get fit. I have a ton of things that hurt, and have hurt for some time, so it's time 2 get that all fixed, and it'll be an on going process. Also I don't like my diet, there's things i want 2 add and things i want to take out, so that's another goal. A goal. I wanna stretch, i wanna yoga, i wanna finish 2011 better then i'm going to leave 2010.

i want it to be a year of maintenance.
yep, i'm going 2 do a few races, a few fun runs, maybe a couple of triathlons, but nothing that i'm planning on building up 2 or specifically train for, i just want 2 train and learn as i go along. Mostly about myself, and about what makes me tick.

I also need 2 plan for the end. I'm getting older, i'm an aging guy, and well, in 3 years and 22 days i'll be a retired person, with what's left, ahead, 2 do with whatever with.
There are a few truths that I understand. Well, maybe just 1.
As we get older, we will find it hard to keep up the speed, the endurance, everything we're used 2, and recovery may take a bit longer, and is even more important. BUT, most of that is all only true if we've ever become all we could. If we've reached the peak of our potential, yep, it's all downhill. BUT, if we have never reached that plateau ...well, we're still reaching, and the sky is the limit. I'm pretty sure the recovery thing still stands, is even more important, and will take longer, but the strive to be all u can b, well, there's no reason 2 expect anything but whatever we've been dreaming about.

A friend sent me an email this past summer, a couple of months before she passed away, that i'll always remember. She told me 2 always strive 2 follow my dreams. 2 b what i wanted to be. I think that's advise we all should live by, i don't think anything could be more true.

The other thing is, it's that time of year. Yep, New Year's is a time of renewal, but the holiday's r also a time to kick back, relax, eat drink and be merry. So u've gotta do the stuff you wanna do, and need 2 do, but just as with everything else, in moderation. Just think b-4 u do anything.

onward and upward, huh...w